Most Thai lady like old farang man. Old farang man have retirement money. “Financial security.”

I like young farang man because I young Thai lady. 26. I have young farang man Luke 31. He tell me he name after Jesus doctor. I don’t know Jesus because I Buddhist, and I don’t know why Jesus need doctor. Thai people think all farang rich, and Thai people think my husband rich because he come from America.

Thai people see me and Luke hold hand and walk in street, Thai people think I bar girl. Thai people think only bar girl have farang husband. I not bar girl.

I lucky Luke eat Thai food. He come from Louisiana. Cajun man. Like spicy food. Luke work for oil company in Thailand Bay. He work 3 week, home 1 week. I want work, but Luke not want me work. I stay home, study English, take English class on night.

My skin dark. Dark = ugly for Thai people. I work last job at internet café and Thai man come there and call me “black.com.” Luke come internet café, he wai me and say sawdee khrab – hello in Thai. I happy see farnag man speak Thai and know Thai greeting. Luke play internet for hour, but I charge him for 15 minute; he ask me for dinner. I go because my family back in my village. If I in my village and Luke ask me for dinner, my parent must say Yes and my older sister come for dinner with me and Luke.

We eat dinner and I ask Luke how he learn speak Thai. He say he give order for Thai worker. Luke not talk much. He quiet. Not loud some farnag man I see in Bangkok. I tell Luke about Thai man make fun my skin. Luke tell me I not dark; he like my skin. Luke say I look like people in Louisiana he call Creole.

I miss Luke 3 week. Week he home we be together all time. Sunday we go church. Luke Catholic. He not try to make me Catholic. I go with him because I love Luke like husband, and I like Jesus Mother. She in church above door and she wai me and I wai her. I take him market with me. 3 week I go market by myself. Luke come market with me, carry bag. I love dry fish.

Old lady sell dry fish in market. Her dry fish best. Cost = 25 Baht. I eat dry fish every day 3 week by myself. Old lady say: “45 Baht.”

“Why? I buy 3 week 25 Baht.”
“You have farang man.”
“I have farang husband 3 week and dry fish cost = 25 Baht.”

Her eye Luke. “Farang can pay more price.”

Chan khun Thai. I Thai people. I not pay more price.”

That Sunday we not eat dry fish. Luke go back work next Sunday. I miss him and I not eat dry fish for 2 week and half. I try other lady dry fish, but she dry fish small and not good like lady who raise price. My belly make me go to her.

I not sure she remember me. I ask about dry fish, she tell me 50 Baht.

“Price high. My husband not here.”
“His money, you have.”
“I Thai people. Chan khun Thai! Chan khun Thai!” I swing my arm, both them crazy. I hit fish on ground. I happy her fish in mud. I step her fish. She yell me, call me crazy, crazy whore.

I not eat dry fish any more.